Alone?

Your personality believes that ultimately he can live all by himself, solitaire. This not only applies to the idea of mental isolation, he believes he simply does not need anyone else, and if it has to, he can even survive physically. This idea is in line with the origin of your personality: you can be separate. It can come in handy to entertain this idea, for example when you do not depend on anyone else, you can close your mind on people who hurt you, you can leave situations that no longer support you, you do not have to face the possibility that you have a desire and that there is no one to meet it, etc. However, your personality usually labels it as pleasant when he is not alone, and when other people appreciate his presence.

Have you ever wondered how your personality interprets a contact with someone else? He only looks at the outside, and interprets everything he sees and hears and notices in other ways. This leads to a judgment: pretty, good, interesting, necessary, unpleasant, boring etc. and these in return call forth feelings in you, which now determine largely his ideas on whether he wants to continue seeing this person, how he experiences the contact etc. According to your personality, contacts are about collecting "bodies" in a relationship in which he preferably feels good about himself. Numbers do matter here, as well as the amount of positive labels that he can give to these people and meetings: he can now prove that he is loved and not abandoned!

Your inner Self does not resemble your personality in any way, it has to do with a level of awareness in which you are not completely separate from others. You share the same basis: an inner Self which is non-judgmental, which Is, and which knows that whatever you give to others you give unto yourself, and whatever you deny others, you deny yourself.

Any form of unity can hardly be found when you focus on the tools of separation (bodies, words and other things), so you have to come up with something different than usual in order to get in touch with this aspect of yourself. Since your inner Self is about a level where you are not completely separate, it is in fact very easy, because now it does not matter who is in front of you. So whether it is your mother, your new friend, your boss, a shoplifter or the man from the gas station. Whether you agree with them at that time or find yourself in a big argument. Each and everyone of these persons offers you in his or her own way the possibility to experience and strengthen unity. Let's assume that this is not too hard with your mother, that it is a nice gift when you experience it with your new friend, you may not even have considered this an opportunity with your boss, you rather close your mind on the shoplifter and the man from the gas station has not spontaneously come to mind as a possibility to join with as well.

Each person you meet offers you the possibility to increase remembrance of your inner Self. Your personality will not be very open to this idea, since he is the aspect who entertains all thoughts and ideas of which he would not want other people to know about (eh, who caused this in the first place?). It affects his sense of independence as well.

There will be many people in your life who take up all kinds of different roles. There are people who help you take care of what you label as basic needs. One takes care of the money you believe you need, other ones take care of the food and other stuff you buy, your house, your travel facilities and your communication facilities. And many other persons offer you in all kinds of situations, the challenge to face your own judgments and choose to no longer label these as truth in themselves, or use them to close your mind on these persons. Maybe their different way of life challenges you, or their behaviour, their standards and values that so obviously differ from yours, etc. And again other people are comfortable safe-zones where you can rest for a while. You fulfill these roles in the lives of other people as well. In this way we keep on offering each other opportunities to act out the choice for personality or inner Self over and over again.

Even when you are already quite experienced and consistent in this choice, the role that you play in each others lives remains important, only now you no longer have to use it to let go, people now offer you the possibility to strengthen your choice for your inner Self over and over again, thus making it more easily accessible for them as well.