Your personality is not an enemy

Your personality proclaims: your inner Self is not real, SINCE he cannot control it or call it forth whenever he wants. Now this is a fine example of upside-down reasoning. At first, he creates an ingenious set of thoughts in order to make you forget that you are an inner Self, then he tells you that BECAUSE he did this, your inner Self does not exist. Do not underestimate the power and ingeniosity of your personality to create a thought system like this, its origin stems from the same source where your inner Self comes from. However, do not let it frighten you either, you have made it yourself, you can undo it yourself as well when you lose interest in it.

Your personality is your own creation, your inner Self is what your "are". What your personality made, you believe becáuse you made it. However, this does not mean this is a truth in itself. And when you take a closer look, it turns out to be no fun at all. Now all you have to do is to choose to no longer believe it, then you stop feeding and thus upholding the thought system.

The process of making something true in the thought system of your personality is much like this: your personality introduces the idea of rejection. You reject someone, which means something like "a way to experience yourself as separated and different from yourself". From your own experience you know that when you are attacked by someone, a personality will defend himself, and attack the other in return. Now you are being rejected in return by the other person (or at least you interpret his reaction as such), and you have made the experience of rejection for yourself "complete", even though the only thing that happened here is, that someone else returned to you what you gave to him in the first place. Your next move is likely to be something like withdrawal or other ways in which you can get rid of the unpleasant feeling that accompanies rejection as much as possible.

Now what is conveniently overlooked here is that it is your personality that introduced the idea that rejection were possible in the first place, and secondly that it could be an appropriate response in certain situations which he now determines for you. There are always two options for you. When you have introduced the idea yourself, you can always stop with carrying it out. When someone else has introduced the idea and uses you as a mirror, then you have the option to not return this idea, thus breaking the vicious circle with which the idea is upheld and strengthened.

So your basic issue is that of true cause and effect. Who or what you really are is not at all affected by your perception of it or lack of awareness of it, or your interpretation of it. It is not true that since you claim that you do not experience your inner Self at this moment, that from this automatically follows that you do not have one. The only thing that you can really influence is whether or not you want to experience your inner Self, and the intensity of the experience. If you want to experience yourself as separated from others and alone, then you have to put effort into creating this unnatural situation and denying yourself the experience of your natural state. Once you start to get bored or annoyed with these results, it will not be very helpful to introduce the idea of an "enemy" within yourself, since that only triggers new routines of rejection, now focused on parts of yourself. Recognize what your personality does, and then stop doing it. Simply because you are no longer really interested in its results and you begin to realize that it only holds you back from experiencing what you really want: your inner Self.